Friday, December 29, 2006

It's that time...

... of year again. That time when I mumble my way through the brooding I have surrounded myself with and find no effective or efficient way to say goodbye.

I loathe and look forward to the period from Diwali to the 5th of January the most. I get contemplative around New Year anyway - stock taking and all nonsense - but two New Years just bloody tears it, don't you know!

It's been a strange year. I cannot, with any honesty, say that it's been a bad year. But neither has it been even acceptable. It's been educational. It's been difficult and wearing. And most importantly it's been, in some ways, empowering.

I've learned, grown, and I've experienced. I've faltered, been weak, and I've known self-doubt. I've felt mad in my head, laughed from my toes, and I've been a penguin. And through everything, I've been sustained primarily by the strength of two wonderful, wonderful men and the tolerance and affection of those I've neglected.

And it's been a year of two very important achievements.

One, that I've truly grown into an individual. I'm finally not part of a group, a herd. No more group cackling over men, jobs, and hair days. A process of evolution rather than eviction, now there is naught but individual relationships and no pressure.

Two, that I've finally learned patience. Or at least, I've learned how to let things come to me... to be instead of becoming. There are a number of people, I'm told, happy that I finally know the difference between silence and quietness.

I'm going to leave you with this wonderful little piece by Thomas Hood and hope like hell that you and I have a good one. :-)

And ye, who have met with Adversity's blast,
And been bow'd to the earth by its fury;
To whom the Twelve Months, that have recently pass'd
Were as harsh as a prejudiced jury -
Still, fill to the Future! and join in our chime,
The regrets of remembrance to cozen,
And having obtained a New Trial of Time,
Shout in hopes of a kindlier dozen.


b said...

I love you sweetheart. Wish we could have continued our christmas/new year traditions of yesteryear. Know that I'm thinking about you and wishing you nothing but the best.
Growing up is a good thing, isn't it? ;0) Here's to the eloquence of silence!!! And quoting Poe
“The true genius shudders at incompleteness - and usually prefers silence to saying something which is not everything it should be.”

Stormy Zephyr said...

Happy New Year E Vestigio! May you be happy all the time.

Casablanca said...

Lovely post. Happy new year to you.

Apologies from me this time, read your email when I was in Delhi and havent been able to reply yet. Will do soon.

aviva said...

HAPPY NOO YEAR! Here's to 2007 - a year that promises much...

{illyria} said...

happy new year's, dear. xx.

Anocturne said...

you've been tagged to do a lame, but sort of fun, quiz. goodness knows, if left to yourself, we might see another post by 2008.

Words Worth said...

Hi. I've disappeared mostly, but wanted to you wish the best of years, one which you'll be able to mold as you choose.

Geetanjali said...

Yes yes, time for a new post my dear...we're well into 2007 and you're several trips behind on this blog ;-)

Brood Mode said...

Happy New Year!